I Killed Sam

I Killed Sam....the fly. For the past week, my bedroom has been taken over by this damn fly that came to be known as Sam. Every day when I come home from work, the fly is buzzing around my room making the annoying sound flies make. The first time I tried to get rid of the annoying pest I opened my window and tried to let it fly out. That did not work. Then I tried to capture it and throw it out the window. That did not work. Then, things became serious. The fly had been flying around my bedroom for hours as I tried to work on my laptop. For some reason, I just could not get any work done. Some noises just BUG me--yes, pun intended. Anyways, my attempts to kill the fly were all failures. Ever notice how a fly can sit still on an object for minutes at a time, but the second you get off your ass to kill it, it gets a sense it is about to be harmed and flies away. I hate that! This damn thing made a home out of my bedroom. The fly had stayed in my room for a week (as of today). My little brother actually started calling the fly by a name "Sam." That's how weird my little brother is, but that's also how long this fly has been lingering around my room. Anyways, tonight, when I was getting out of the shower, I spotted my chance. I whipped the towel off from around my waist and with one huge sweep, I knocked the fly out of mid air. It must have been paralyzed by the looks of my sexy, nude body. Just kidding. But seriously. The little fellow was lying on the ground helpless. I stood there watching as Sam tried to get up and fly but he was too crippled to do so. For a second, I found myself feeling sympathetic- maybe he was a lonely friend and was seeking a human companion. WTF?!? Who am I kidding? This fly probably has 1000 eggs ready to hatch around my room. I wrapped the thing in a piece of toilet paper and with one quick flush, Sam was gone. I killed him. How sad.